I took a shower and got refreshed for The Arrival. Shortly thereafter, I heard the knock on the door and raced to get The Prairie Daddy up.
Together we walked in to meet our daughter. I cannot describe the feelings that you go through in those first few moments. Everything in you that built up to wanting to grab her up and never let go gives way to the realization she has no idea where she is or who you are. You guard her and protect her by being cautious and slow. You softly talk and give her space as she stays close to the one she knows. You wait. You kneel. You offer. You hold back.
There was something in me though that felt like she didn't look like my daughter. Her face was somehow different. I felt weird about feeling this way. There was a reason behind it though, she had a swollen face and a bump on her forehead. More on that later.
Here is the video of the introduction:
And this is the email I sent to our family and friends:
"They brought her to us this morning. I am desperately in love. She cried miserably for two hours but wouldn't let me put her down. We got her to stop briefly for a moment or two here and there. Thankfully she clung to me, even though still distressed. She took two bites of peanut butter, a sip of water and a bite of bread but that was all she'd eat.
After a couple of hours, I put on the baby carrier and strapped her in it. A few minutes later she was sound asleep. Bless her heart, she wore herself right out!
She's sleeping next to me on the bed.
Later we'll see if she'll eat and then we'll walk to the market with (The Intern) and we'll make rice and sauce for dinner.
A Mama and Daddy Finally With Their Daughter
When she woke up we were like glue. She wanted nothing to do with anyone else. The Prairie Daddy had to be quite careful because she was scared of him. Poor guy, every time he'd look at her she'd cry.
She let me feed her
And change her
And played with me
When no one else was around she'd even begin to try to speak.
That first night we put her in her new pjs and gave her the toothbrush we bought her. And then we put her in the little bed in the corner of our room and she went to sleep.
I was overwhelmed that night. When I finally crawled into bed I remember having a panic attack inside. I felt like bawling and I wondered, "what in the world did we do?" I was shaking with fear inside and had to pray through the horrible emotions that swelled up privately within my soul.
Thankfully, I woke the next morning and the panic was gone. We were with our daughter and it was Father's Day!